It has been a whirlwind for the past few weeks.
It has only been this past 24 hours that I have begun to feel somewhat normal again.
I don't think I fully realized just how tired I really was.
Family life, Masters program, and end-of-year teaching are back underway.
Carmen is over.
This past weekend was such a rollercoaster, as I forgot that performances can be. There were such highs - opening night was superb!- and then such lows, as I think I had some post-production depression going on. As I've never had a role, I was told that the bigger your role, the harder the lows will hit you afterward...makes sense to me, since you work so hard, get (or hopefully get) the acclaim, then it's all over. I was told by many how well they thought I did - even some thinking I could have handled the lead?! Not sure about that, due mainly to my lack of experience, but I was grateful for the encouragement. My voice teacher came on Sunday's performance...then came backstage to say hello...and I'm not sure what she thought. She didn't say one way or the other, which could be bad or good. Of course, I'm taking it all sorts of bad ways...but I will know soon enough when I have another lesson. Jon has been helping me get out of thinking about it badly, and trust what everyone else was saying - that I performed well. The DVD is coming soon...although I know I will watch it (I couldn't stand not doing so)...I am a little afraid. I don't want to blot out good memories by being disappointed in myself when I actually see what I look like onstage. We are all our own worst critics.
All in all...so glad I did this. The only real hardship was tech week, because I was gone so much and I was SO tired when I was home, that I wasn't worth much to the family. If the rehearsal schedule had been longer, it would not have been good for the boys. But, it worked out, we are all back together, and life is getting back to normal. I have been told by many in the Carmen cast that there is an opera company based in a town near me that I could sing with...so maybe I can get something with them next. Local would be WAY easier...we'll see. :)